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i don't suffer from insanity... i enjoy every minute of it... | |||
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Sunday, February 05, 2006 i may not know how to play hockey, but i sure know how to crack a hockey stick over your head yeah.. i dunno i think i'm in one of my "moods" again. like... sulky/angry? i dunno... maybe its a lack of sleep. had hockey practice this morning. omigosh. i. suck. haha it kinda makes me laugh but also kinda frustrates me too... i like to be at least decent if i'm gonna play a sport... not totally suck.. i'd like to sorta know what i'm doing! plus i alwayz manage to hurt myself somehow. my bum hurts cuz i keep falling on it so much. and i hurt my tummy SOMEHOW i don't even know. all i know is that i hurt. alwayz. everytime i have practice/a game. i SUCK. and i think being in one of these angry moods doesn't really help either... it makes me more frustrated about how much i suck. like i was totally ready to make a nasty comment to someone who said something about how i alwayz fall on my butt. i was SO ready to say something nasty about them... but i stopped myself. and then i kept imagining scenarios where i got to beat someone with a hockey stick... but i'm not really sure why i don't like this person so much... like i mean i was just making them a total jerk in my imagined scenario but in real life i don't really know them. i guess maybe thats part of the reason? because unlike most of the people on the team who are nice and friendly and stuff i get the impression that this person is snobby. but i mean i don't even know them. i dunno if they're snobby... i just get the impression and i guess that kinda makes me like them if they really are snobby... cuz i'm judging them based on... my first impression of them. but i know i do that a lot... like... have you ever had the impression that someone didn't like you... but you couldn't think of a reason why? thats the feeling i get with this person. i guess i haven't really tried all that hard to get to know them either... but i don't really wanna cuz i get this feeling they don't like me and they're snobby but i don't REALLY know that... i mean they seem to get along with most other people... maybe its just me thinking they're snobby so i'm being snobby? (this whole rant thing made more sense in my head than it does now...) haha and when i was imagining getting into a fight with this person i got so angry... it kinda made me laugh.. i guess its better to make it up in my head then actually acting on it! makes me think i'm a lil unstable tho... and this whole sucking at hockey... its stoobud but its making me not want to play as much... like... it just doesn't seem as fun... i guess i'll stick to it i mean it would kinda suck if i just stopped playing cuz i suck... but i dunno maybe hockey's just not my thing... sorry... 0_o ( 12:30 AM ) ~ punchyfruit ~ |
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